A Letter to My Future Sad Self

Dear Jessica,

You are sad, I understand.  You feel like there is no hope, that nothing is going to get better, and that everything has a dark cloud surrounding it.  You don’t feel like smiling, laughing, or even talking.  You are barely dragging yourself out of bed just to fall asleep on the couch.  Every fiber of your being refuses to go to work or school, and you definitely don’t have cleaning the house on your mind.

I understand where you are standing right now.  I’ve been there before.  But let me tell you something- and you’re not going to want to hear it- it will get better.  You will get through this.  I know it doesn’t seem like it right now.  Looking on the bright side of things with hope in your mind is not something your are capable of right now, and I realize that.  But I say it again: it will get better!

Your days of gloom will pass.  Slowly but surely, happiness will creep into your life again.  But it’s not going to do it on its own.  You’re going to have to work for it.  I know, I know.  You don’t want to work for it!  You don’t feel like it!  Putting effort into something?  Yuck!  But try to get passed that attitude!  Because you can do it; you’ve done it before.

Remember that when you’re sad, something is seriously lacking in your life.  It might be feeling connected to someone: if that’s the case, spend some time with Josia.  Hug him, kiss him, cuddle with him.  Call your mom.  She’ll always be there to listen to you.

It might be that you’re not taking care of yourself.  When’s the last time that you showered?  Five days ago?  Go take a shower, it will make you feel better!  When’s the last time that you wrote something?  Oh, you don’t remember?  Write!  Anything!   I don’t care if all you do is get out a piece of paper and write, “I wrote a letter to myself in the past for when I’m feeling sad, and in it I told myself to write something.”  It’s a start, and it will spark other though.  When’s the last time that you crocheted?  When’s the last time you colored?  When’s the last time you did anything creative?  You know that you feel so much better when you are able to express yourself creatively, so go out and create something!

It might be that you’re so stressed out and overwhelmed, that your emotions are all out of whack and all you feel is that big, gaping hole of sadness inside you.  If that’s the case, unplug yourself from the world.  Go hide in the bedroom with a good book, light some candles, and eat some chocolate.  It will relax you, and in turn, cheer you up.

I know that you’re sad right now, and I know what that’s like it.  It feels like it’s never going to change.  But it will; trust me.  Just stop and breathe for a moment, and start taking care of yourself.

Happiness is out there, and you will be happy again.

With love,

Jessica

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